Limits of the inventory
Any short questionnaire simplifies reality. The Relationship Closeness Inventory is useful for reflection and conversation when you know what it was built for — and what it was not.
The 1989 study
Berscheid, Snyder, and Omoto developed the inventory for research with 241 university students. Findings described how undergraduates experienced closeness in their social world at the time. They do not automatically apply to every age group, culture, or relationship structure today.
Campus-era activity lists
Shared-activity checklists include items such as attending class, working on homework, or living in a dorm-oriented routine. If you are decades past student life, some prompts will feel odd. Answer for the past week as literally as you can, or mentally substitute the closest real equivalent (video calls, co-working, school pickup). Missing every checkbox does not mean you lack closeness — it may mean the list was never meant for your lifestyle.
Why we say the world has changed
Communication, cohabitation, and dating norms in 1989 did not include smartphones, widespread remote work, or many current family forms. Influence questions still capture important ideas, but they were not written with today’s digital social life in mind. Treat odd wording as a reason to discuss your actual habits, not as a failed test.
What the score does not measure
- Conflict, respect, or safety in the relationship
- Physical or emotional abuse
- Sexual satisfaction or compatibility
- Mental health or attachment “types”
- Whether you should marry, break up, or have children
A high closeness score can exist in relationships that are unhealthy for other reasons. A low score can exist in respectful, long-term partnerships that are intentionally independent.
Online adaptation
This website is an informal port of the research idea, not a licensed clinical instrument. Scoring is automated; no clinician reviews your answers. Results are stored so links can be shared. None of that replaces professional guidance when you need it.
Using the inventory well
Pair the score with context from What closeness means and How it works. Retake it after major life changes if you want a new snapshot — and remember that last week’s busyness can move the number without moving the relationship’s long-term importance.